I hate myself I hate my life. It's over for me.

[ToyotaFreak]

I really feel suicidal, losing hope on myself.

So, I failed three subjects (Out of four subjects.) in Curtin international College this term.

Me being the honest person (I'm the type that hates to lie.), told my mother about my results & apologize. She just blew off, like as if its the end of the world. I'm not saying that failing uni is a good thing (I'm disappointed in myself too.).

After all these abuse (Among a couple, she did threaten me with a meat cleaver once, and this happened recently, couple of months back. She do crazy things like these not just to me, but also to my sister & father.). My mom's the always criticizing (And more criticizing.), don't care, & complaining type of person.

As much as I want to try even harder to at least pass my diploma units, or even better, get good grades, I'm starting to lose hope.

I wished I have a normal life like other people in the world.

Edited October 28, 2008 by ToyotaFreak

[Jay.]

perhaps consider doing a tafe course? unis not for everyone, better to realise that now than later

[levinboy]

We all at one time or another dont do aswell as we hope in our exams but there only exams at the end of the day.

And your mum is only being a mum i know what you mean when she is critizing you as my mum does it to me also, and recently kicked me out of home, but in saying that mothers come around and really show you how much they care about you, so hang in there please dont do anything you will regret.

Im sure there are many others on here that will show you there support

[J e r e M y]

Yeah..or u can get personal tutors to help you with it?

R u stuyding the right way?

Like they always say.. before u want ur marks to change...u have to change urself 1st..

also..try seeing a counselor...CIC have their own counselors..would help maybe??

dont give up..all u gotta do..is take it as a motivation..work harder..study harder..

*** only help those who help themselves...

im sure ive got a shiatter life then u do :) so chins up!

[Kenneth]

MY DEAR FRIEND!

Have faith in yourself because the day you loose faith in yourself is the day everyone looses faith on you :) Nothing is the end of the world! School does not gauge how smart or how good of a person you are. Its simply an indicator of how nerdy you can be ;) Remember that...

Relax a bit, just dont think too much and give it a few days your mum will be better then you can have a talk with her, like what jay. suggested.. tafe is good :)

[Silly-Karr]

Are you being cereal?

[ToyotaFreak]

perhaps consider doing a tafe course? unis not for everyone, better to realise that now than later

Looks like I'll have to persuade to them about TAFE. That was what I wanted to do originally (I was going to take a course in Engineering Drafting there.), but my parents were fully against the idea (Any opposing opinions, suggestions or ideas= Considered as arguing to them which will make them find a way to avoid the discussion.).

Jeremy: Yeah, I'll make another appointment with CIC this week (Flying off this Saturday.).

I think I'll get my mother & father to sit down and discuss about this in a civilized manner (Will be hard, but I'll try to.).

Edited October 28, 2008 by ToyotaFreak

[mrs.sportivo]

thats asian parents for ya, just relax im sure she only blows it out of proportion to try and scare/motivate you (?) LOL my mum use to say "when you grow up if u dont make it into uni ur gunna pay me all your school fee's back" LOL yeah turns out she was only joking :) and really she is proud of me for actually finishing my HSC after i failed tragically with 2 other schools.

ya bro, if your failing uni maybe its a sign that you shouldnt be there ? since seems asif the only reason you are there is because of your mother, its your *** damn life you can do whatever you want - fk your mum :)

[marc2020]

Failing 3 out of 4 subjects just proves you arent in the course you enjoy, so obviously it isnt right for you. You should do the course you will enjoy and are most interested in. Dont be too worried about your mum, she is your mum and loves you no matter what. She just needs to get over the fact that you arent cut out for what ever course you are doing. Most parents, especially asian ones are like that, mine were the same. I used to make up for my ****ty marks in high school by sucking up big time, and after a while they get over it, they always will.

[TRDYUS]

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why I succeed."

- Michael Jordan

[Kenster]

Don't feel like that honestly most Asian parents are like that, i know how its like to have the pressure. May be find something that could help you achieve your goals and go from it there.

Dont lose hope just keep on trying, plus just pretend when your mum is whinging just pretend you are listerning to music and let the thing just go past the other ear.

Good luck with things at home

[Kevsta]

These are only exams. If you can't get through this time, just try a little harder the next time you attempt them or choose a course that you are interested in. At the end of the day, that piece of paper that you get from uni/college is simply a foot in the door of your first job.

Your mum is typical of the the older generation asian mum. She doesn't realise this, but her old traditional ways of trying to get you to do better by criticising and scaring you simply does not work and generally encourages low self esteem. Hence, why alot of asian people tend to be introverts.

[Cappuccino]

Failing 3 out of 4 subjects just proves you arent in the course you enjoy, so obviously it isnt right for you. You should do the course you will enjoy and are most interested in. Dont be too worried about your mum, she is your mum and loves you no matter what. She just needs to get over the fact that you arent cut out for what ever course you are doing. Most parents, especially asian ones are like that, mine were the same. I used to make up for my ****ty marks in high school by sucking up big time, and after a while they get over it, they always will.

I agree you need to do something that you ENJOY and not do something because you parents want you to do something. I have never gone to tafe or uni because i didnt see the need to do so for my career. I see people all the time doing uni course because there parents want them too and dont even get into the same field of work as there uni degree so it was 3 - 4 years down the drain. These days there is so many different channels to get into different types of industries and i believe uni degrees don't have the same meaning they once did. Some of us sydney guys where discussing this the other day. Majority of business do prefer experience over someone who has been at uni. Uni + experience is always better. Although zoom did make a point that people with uni degrees to show commitment because they have spent 4 years doing a course.

At the end of the day I believe (this is my opinion only) that uni is good if you want to get in to and industry that requires it such as a doctor, solicitor, sciencetist etc. Give it time and you parents will calm down and everything will be sweet again my dad stopped talking to me for a month because i bought the corolla and i had two cars.

Just dont do anything stupid everything happens for a reason you live once and just go out there and enjoy life!

[wishbone]

head up dude!! how is that the end of the road for u? u know who ***** smith is right??? he left school in yr 10....he makes millions of dollars a year.....theres heaps out there....jst goes to show u dont need to go 2 university to be sucessful...that being said im starting uni next year...and ill prob fail :P....like wat the other fellas tell ya...if u dont enjoy it...u wont do too well...if ur passionate abt somethin, chase it!! im sure u will get loads more cash doin that then doin wat u dont like! bro drop this whole suicide ****!! this isnt even a huge part of ur life!!

[MZTRD]

I know what the pressure is like and i can imagine how you're feeling but then again like everyone said, you should always do something you enjoy and happy with.

Some asian parents will always be the same - very traditional and only wants what's best for their child/children.

But always have faith and never give up cos what's the point in giving up now when you've already started. Push yourself to the limit, smile girly, it's not the end of the world ..

[Ascendant Rice]

My mums liek that, but ive explained to her that id rather go tafe then uni because i want to be in the it business and tafe has more oppertunies. at girst she was reluctant to accept my claim but with time she curved along. So you failed uni its not the end of the world youve got loving friends and family who care about you. so my recommendation is to have a walk and think about what step you can take next and decide what will make you happy. i hear tafe is pretty good and stuff. well theres my 2cents hope you feel beeter mate.

-Ascendant justice

[HaiiSon]

Just to clear some things up

CIC=Another pathway into curtin university of technology

so like i dont think he has a choice to choose units, just has tobe done to get into curtin i guess

all i can say is COME TO ECU

its hell awesome down here

ECU=Edith Cowan University (Super Tafe)

[apg39]

Tell her to get over it, its your life not hers.

I've dropped out of Uni & TAFE...but 2 years later I have a 50k job.

Nothings impossible & having a Uni degree means nothing now because everyones got them. Uni students sit in a class room & learn how to do things according to textbooks and write everything on paper. But TAFE students actually physically do it & IMO they are a hell of alot more attractive when it comes to hiring someone because they can do it, not just studied how to do it.

[qkslvr]

Dude, Asian parents are like that. They came to this country with nothing and they've seen how tough it can be working 9-5 factory jobs. So they just want the best for you. They see education as a ticket to a better lifestyle, but as you get older you'll realise that that's not the case - it's a means to a job you enjoy. If your course won't get you where you really want to go, then you have to figure what will. At the end of the day it's your life, just work up a little more courage to tell her what YOU want to do. Don't be afraid to try while you're still young, you'll end up wasting more time hanging around wondering what could have been than if you just tried and failed in the first place. If you succeed, even better =)

Cheer up dude, life's not so clear cut but things always work out in the end. Always. :D

p.s this talk of suicide is not a good thing man. talk to someone you trust face to face.

keep us posted.

Edited October 28, 2008 by qkslvr

[One-pager]

Hey, you should hear my story. It should give you some hope.

Back in 2004 I graduated from Balwyn High School with an ENTER of 94.2

I had in my head that I wanted to do Commerce, but a major contributing factor to that had been my parents telling me to do it.

So I got into Monash University Clayton Campus doing Bachelor of Commerce (Finance & Accounting).

My friend and I used to wag all the time and hang out at Melb Uni with our other friends.

I failed 2 out of 4 subjects in first semester and then 4 out of 4 in second semester.

End of 2005 I got called up to the Academic Progress Committee and pleaded for a second chance.

First sem of 2006 I had a bit of motivation now, but we still wagged nearly every class. But, I passed 3 out of 4 subjects.

Then I got bored with studying again and in second semester of 2006 I failed 4 out of 4.

Luckily, my friend had scored a full time Job at Toyota CHQ, through the Bachelor of Accounting program (Work experience placement).

Through him, I landed the job I have now, working full-time at Toyota CHQ in the accounting area and earning just about $49,000 a year.

Oh yeah, I withdrew from my course before they could kick me out (it was inevitable) and I plan to apply for Open uni to finish my degree.

I know how you're feeling. There were dark days at the end of 2005 when I thought "wtf am I going to do." Every cloud has a silver lining.

You just need to wait for/find it. Good luck.

[bozurolla]

hey matey,Heads up ey? we all can relate to what your goin thru from critisizing parents to the pressure of study..but talk of suicide is a serious matter & I'm pretty sure the members local & nationally would support you in these hard times.

there are ways in getting around issues/problems in life & when i get out of it this will make you feel better that u stuck it out,gutted it out & make you a better person..

I've been through what ur going thru..I believe you'lle make it thru..& if u need any help,chit chats,open forums over a cup of Cha i'm pretty sure the members including i to help out

Good luck

[LEGEND888]

LOL... cheer up bro.... i know failing is not nice.. specially when you have tried really2 hard....

seriously... a few of my friend said that you have been trying really hard in UNI... they spotted you always doing work mate!!

so yeh.... Maybe TAFE could be the answer?? i mean.. its all about azn parents... they all want their kids to go uni/UWA in here? LOL! they gotta be kidding mate!

ill be honest here... i failed school.... badly... LOL....

if u ask a few of my friends.. at foundation math... i got "ZERO" mark for test once... and that seriously kicks me on the nut.... LOL.. so yeh...

and i got a few "E" grade for year 11.... but still manage to graduate year 12 with secondary certificate...

Doing what i want now :)... refrigeration and air con... at TAFE... and im having a great career pathway at the moment...

so yeh... just think about switching to tafe..... coz all these ppl who said TAFE ppl are failures and cant suceed! they can **** THEM SELF!! really....

:)

[saintly]

mate, do what your heart is telling you to do (except for the suicidal part)...

there are plenty of ways to make a living even without getting into the nasty stuff like drugs.

TAFE is just as good as Uni (even back in my days)... I don't have a degree but an adv dip after 3 rounds of offers.

asian parents are mostly the same, they threaten so you succeed

[Jaaassseeee]

Irregardless of what your parents want you to do, ultimately at the end of the day it is YOU who chooses your own future. Never let someone else tell you what to do, because then you will be forever controlled by other people. Respect their opinions on why they want you to do such and such, but never be forced.

My dad REALLY wanted me to do Accounting, but guess what? That sh.it totally bored the crap out of me, took me 3 years to realise it isn't my cup of tea (Ask Jeremy how I flunked everything last semester rather spectacularly). Now I've changed to Marketing, I'm enjoying what is being taught to me and I am averaging 82% on all my units !

Also, to my surprise my mother was the one who encouraged me to do Marketing. Yeah, the asian genes in her does get naggy sometimes, but in the end you're her son and she loves you. My mum has done some whacky stuff, but we just laugh it off after a while when things have cooled down.

Once I moved out (which was 2 years ago, and I was 20) things started to chill, my olds started to become a lot more understanding to my needs. They realise they were at that stage once and it was hard for them to concentrate as well. So you know, they support me whenever I need them and there isn't much else you can ask for.

Again, regarding your studies; there is nothing better than to just get your head down and study. I absolutely dreaded highschool (which is kind of the same as CIC as you need to pass to get into uni) but I just stuck to it and aimed for the light at the end of the tunnel. Once I was done, it was like scoring a nice wave down south (Sorry for the surf analogy).

You also need to understand from your parent's perspective, and I can also confirm this from being a rather young Accounts Payable Coordinator (I was damn lucky), if we had a choice between employing people with 1) University Degree 2) Tafe Cert 3)Experience, we would choose Tafe last. It has nothing against those who graduated from Tafe, as I'm sure there will be bright students graduating from that too. The simple fact is that University is more recognised, structured, and ultimately better students come out of there in general.

Life is never that bad to get suicidal man. Al, give us TOCAU boys a nudge on facebook...you know where we all are. Go out or a chat or something. Fu.cking hell, if it means me driving down to Mandurah to pick you up and have a drink I'd be more than happy to comply. We can also do with one less sad sod around the forums!! :P

[One-pager]

I think this calls for an emergency TOCAU drinkup. Are you guys in melb?